Proverbs 27:6 Wounded Faithfully

Proverbs 27:6  Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy. (NASB)

Are you a friend?  A real friend?

This proverb shares an interesting truth about real friendship that we all should remember.  Real friends have the courage to say the hard things to one another.  I’m not suggesting we intentionally hurt our friend, that’s not the thought here. 

Paul writing to the believers in Ephesus says, “But speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ,” Ephesians 4:15  Delivery style of the message therefore is pretty important.  Speak the truth, the hard truth, but do it in a loving way. 

By saying the hard things to our friend we help them grow up into Christ likeness and the quoted passage seems to indicate doing so helps us grow too.  After all, it takes a measure of maturity to say the hard things in a loving way even once the courage to do so is garnered.  This process is one of the key reasons we are walking through this life on earth. 

Now on the other hand, sometimes it is our turn to hear the difficult things we need to hear because we’re out of line in our behavior in some way.  You read about my recent behaving badly experience with Sharon (see ‘Willing Spirit, Weak Flesh) where she needed to call me on the carpet.

It is hard to hear bad news about ourselves, we’re naturally defensive and we get our feelings hurt.  A real friend will risk the hurt counting on the strength of the relationship to help a friend change.  The proverb calls that friend, “Faithful”.  Another favorite proverb says, “Iron sharpens iron, So one man sharpens another”. Proverbs 27:17  The thought is that we’re in this together and helping each other improve is good so we should try hard to accept what our friend has to say.

The alternative is ugly.  When we misbehave but get hugs and kisses from others in response, those aren’t really our friends now are they?  AMEN!